Let's be honest.

They don't all work out the way we'd like them to, do they? I hesitated to post this project because it showcases my flaws (in both my knitting and my personality) in such a spectacular way, but I figured why not be realistic. I am almost always impatient and sometimes a little lazy, and those traits have repercussions.



Pattern: Sexy Vesty (Rav link)
Yarn: Jo-Ann Dreamweave, a wool/silk blend I got on sale
Needles: 8's for the body, 7 for the armhole and neck ribbing

CanaryKnits made up this little recipe for a lacy vest and she is very clear that it is not a pattern, but more a general set of guidelines, so the pattern is not to blame for what went wrong. What went wrong is all due to me, and my problems were 5-fold:

1. As I was knitting, it seemed way too small. CanaryKnits was clear that the vest was made for a person with a 35" bust, and my bust is definitely bigger than that. I justified my decision to keep knitting because on Ravelry, someone commented that this yarn "blooms like no yarn I've seen before". So I just figured it would get bigger with blocking. Did I swatch and test this theory? Nope. I just yellled at Daisy on Daisy of Love for having such terrible taste in men and such an unscrupulous plastic surgeon.



2. Ouch. Look at those terrible seams. The thing is that despite my best efforts, I didn't make the front and back the same length at the armholes. I had a feeling I had messed this up, but I somehow ignored this feeling and kept knitting.



3. Look at those tiny armholes! The guidelines said to knit for 2 inches before binding off the top, but that just isn't enough for my arms. I tried on the vest after seaming up the shoulders and the armholes were very clearly too tight, but I somehow convinced myself that adding on the armhole ribbing would fix this. Seriously? How does that even make sense AT ALL??

4. You can't see it that well in these pictures, but the decreases at the front center are wonky as well. Somehow I picked up stitches so that the wrong side was facing me, which meant I had to use P2tog and SSPthroughbackloop to decrease. It looks ridiculous from the right side.



5. Not only is it too tight, it's also way too short. Again, my delusions about blocking led me to ignore the obvious and keep knitting.

So that's it, friends- a real UGH! to add to my Ravelry page. The sad part is that I'm so done with this project that I don't even think I'll frog it for the yarn. The yarn is soft and has a nice halo, but I hate it now because it is associated with nothing but self-contempt.

On to the next, though, right? I'm going to Toronto tomorrow and have big plans to visit all the yarn shops in the area. One of them, the Naked Sheep, is apparently having a huge sale with 25% off every yarn in the store. Can you believe my luck?

If anyone has any ideas of things to do in Toronto this weekend, I would very much appreciate it!